Writing to you today from a Nashville coffee shop on my coffee shop hopping spree. Cheers to living on the edge, right? After talking to a lot of my friends one-on-one, and hearing their feelings about comparisons to others, I just wanted to shed some light on some ideas revolving around self-love and developing natural confidence. I previously wrote this blog post about ditching comparisons to others, and focusing on self-love and inner beauty- but it still rings true…

1) Do it for you- not for anyone else…

Don’t worry about what other people think or how they perceive you. It’s natural to desire to be liked and accepted, but how you choose to live your life should not revolve around being liked and accepted. As the saying goes, “Well behaved women rarely make history.”

2) Physical activity and exercise… 

Ahh… the cliches. “Just go to the gym… You’ll feel so much better with the endorphins running through you’re body…” You know what? It’s true. Exercising on a regular basis WILL help you to feel better about yourself and think more positively. The key is to be consistent, find workouts you love, keep mixing up your workouts- and simply know what works best for you. Variety will keep you from growing bored with your routine.

It wasn’t until I discovered bikram yoga and barre classes that I truly felt like I was “100 percent” enjoying every second of my workouts and looked forward to going to the gym… However, you know what they say… “No pain, no gain.” It is the moments in your workouts when you are pushing yourself to do more that will bring you more confidence over time. You will feel better about yourself, the more consistent you are with your workouts.

3) Treat yourself well… Embrace the feminine goddess within…

It is important to treat yourself the way you would love for your best friend to treat you. If that means releasing self-judgement and criticism, set a few small goals each day surrounding doing so.

Self-care makes a huge difference. The best kind of self-care is a balance of focusing on the inside and the outside. Inner beauty is most important, and shines through to the outside. The most important thing is to feel positively about yourself… If you feel like a goddess, people will see…

If getting your hair done once a month brings you confidence, invest in yourself. If treating yourself to an inexpensive piece of jewelry occasionally brings you comfort and positive feelings, do it. If getting a manicure makes you feel more girly, do it.

However, the biggest shifts occur when balancing the inner and outwork work- the inner and outer beauty. The balance of meditation, putting effort into thinking and feeling more positively, self-reflection combined with being proactive about making changes, journaling- and putting effort into external and physical appearances. BALANCE…

4) Don’t compare yourself to other people…

Walk your own path… Be in your own league… 

Stop comparing yourself to other people. There is only one you… Once you stop living to be perfect, space is clear for better experiences and opportunities.

Regardless of how someone else’s life appears to be online, they have their own obstacles and challenges that you may not see. You can never live someone else’s life… but you can make your own life amazing, peaceful, and harmonious. You can only create your own success. Focus on yourself.

I noticed a trend when I go out with my friends- taking pictures “for the gram” or for social media, as opposed to saving pictures for saving a memory of the experience. I love to print pictures, especially because I feel like no one saves tangible pictures nowadays. It’s crazy how that became retro, right? I can’t believe it. It needs to be said that taking pictures simply for social media only feeds into a validation-seeking culture. This is where insecurities and comparisons to others creep in.

With the rise of social media, it can be challenging to not compare yourself to others. Living in an over-sharing culture can be tough- and sometimes it can feel “too flashy.” Social media doesn’t need to be a beauty contest.

Even as a blogger, I need to take a social media detox once and I while in order to focus on myself and own priorities. I delete Facebook and Instagram from my phone and go off the grid from technology as much as I can for a few days to a week… For a proper social media detox, delete social media apps from your devices, and set a specific amount of time to take off social media in order to challenge yourself. Whenever I take a break from social media, I feel so much more confident in myself and my perspective shifts to see that I am not missing too much at all. It is simply a collection of pictures.

Hoping you enjoyed this blog post, and it brought you a renewed sense of confidence. Thanks for stopping by, friend. Embrace the goddess within… 

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